I was good and had this all ready to post yesterday, but Blogger had "issues." Guess that's what I get for refusing to pay for a domain...
May 25 - Nursezilla
The night after surgery consisted of one- to two-hour increments of foggy non-sleep; broken up by my IV tower beeping (low battery, out of blood, I’m a pain-in-the-ass machine ha ha ha), the nurse coming in to check my vitals, and the tech coming in to empty my catheter bag and surgical drains.
That, and the spasms. All of my limbs seemed to have a case of the twitchies, which wasn’t so bad, until it was my right leg’s turn again. My whole leg would kick, sending a shooting pain through my hip that woke me from whatever form of sleep I had been enjoying.
Around 7:00am on Day 2, things started to look better: breakfast appeared on my overbed table. People started calling my mom to see how I was doing, and the standard answer was, “she’s got food in front of her now, so she’s happy.”
Given that my nurse the night before had been so cheerful and attentive, I had no idea what was coming. My nurse for the day seemed nice enough, if a little cranky, in the morning. By that evening, however, I wanted her dead.
I started to feel feverish at around 4, and I asked her to take my temperature. Nursezilla said she “already had taken my temperature” (3 hours before), that it was 100, and that they “don’t do anything until it goes above 101.” For the next several hours, I tried to nap, but I felt like my head was boiling.
I called for Nursezilla when the IV tower started beeping; saying it was on low battery. She didn’t come. A short while later, I called again when my epidural ran dry. She didn’t come. Did I mention that I was being given no other pain medication besides said epidural?
Finally, the charge nurse came in, and found me sobbing uncontrollably, and my mother with a vein about to burst out of her forehead. Nursezilla came in shortly thereafter, with the nurse who would be working overnight. They didn’t say anything to me at all; they just stood at the IV tower, trying to figure out how to get it going again.
Finally, Nursezilla took my temperature (I can only guess the charge nurse made her do it). 101.6. Suck it, Nursezilla. I wasn’t just whining after all! She gave me some Tylenol… and told us we needed to close the curtains, because it was the sun coming in the window that was making me feverish! Then she turned the thermostat down to 60 and left for the night, saying, “I’ll see you tomorrow!” I just groaned and lay back down. And froze my ass off all night.
My poor mother stayed with me all night- for the second night in a row- because she was afraid to leave me at their mercy. I appreciated it more than she’ll ever know, especially since she had to spend the night chasing down someone to empty my catheter bag and drains every few hours, before they burst.
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