Wednesday, March 02, 2005

Such is the nature of this business that you are either obscenely busy, or impatiently waiting for something to do. I like to be busy, I just don't like to be busy in the "oh man it's all got to get done right now and I only have one day to do a week's worth of work" sense. How I long for a nice, predictable, steady flow of work, every day.

Right now, I am bored because I have done everything I can do on this project, for the moment, without either A) talking to a consultant about equipment, who can't see me until Monday; or B) going out to the site to measure existing conditions, which also isn't happening until Monday. It's only a one-room project, for cryin' out loud. There's not a whole lot else I can do that hasn't already been done.

I am quite dangerous when I'm bored at work. When I get bored like this, I start thinking about other things I could be doing for a living, and I'm still coming up with a big, fat zero. My latest fancy is getting a license to become a Registered Accessibility Specialist, so I can start my own consulting business. Every time I think about "starting my own business," the fear sets in. I know the proper way for me to do it would be to start it "on the side," but honestly, I barely want to work the 40 hours I'm working now. That leaves the other option: jumping in with both feet and doing it full time from the beginning. Hence, the fear.

ManThing and I watched Office Space again this past weekend, and I find myself making the same lamentation as Peter when he wondered why he couldn't just got to work and be happy about it. Why, indeed? Why do I have to make such a big damn deal out of this? Most people don't like what they do. Why should I be special? I don't have these thoughts nearly as often when I'm busy, but I lack the ambition to search for more work during these slow times.

"You see, Bob, it's not that I'm lazy. I just don't care."

1 comment:

Buildit said...

You know I have been doing the EXACT same thing. I have the opposite work situation- piles and piles of the same thing to do, no end in site, and if you have to take a little more time or hold things up you do.
I keep thinking that I need some stress, a deadline, Etc. Then I remember that I don't do stress well, and largely ignore deadlines.

I think that's why I want to become an artist of some sort- do my own thing and hopefully later someone will pay for what I have done.... But you can't take cash when you are dead.

to sum up " if you liked it they wouldn't have to pay you."